Tag: familybusiness

They Are There

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Customer Service. When you are scared and in need of shelter from an abusive partner. They are there. Your name will be kept private, your room number will be guarded, They will keep you safe.

When nature displays its’ unforgiving reign upon your home and you need shelter and food. They are there. Warm meals, a soft bed, a phone to call loved ones, a hot shower to wash away the fears, a willing and sympathetic ear. They will reinforce your resolve.

When the world is disrupted, provoked by the most hateful of men and hearts. They are there. Doors will be opened, with only the need, not a request. They will feed you and those that are there to rescue and protect you. They will fortify your bodies.

When heaven has called for a piece of your heart. They are there. Details will be tended, dresses and suits fitted and pressed, flowers arranged in tribute, life’s and lord’s words copied in short time to comfort, savory and sweet will be laid for weary guests and family. They will lighten your burden.

When time serves joyous morsels upon your life. They are there. Champagne and rose petals abound with chocolates and well wishes. Smiles and laughter advance the merriment. They relish your happiness.

When you have shown great indiscretion. They are there. Messes will be cleaned, forgotten items safeguarded, profane words overlooked and coarse behavior disregarded. They will rise above your discourse.

They, we, are always there. Welcoming and serving our guests and neighbors in crisis, sorrow and joy. Service warriors everywhere, desk clerks, housekeepers, maintenance, servers, bartenders, cooks, clerks, technicians, janitors, delivery people, drivers, cashiers, laundry, dishwashers, clerks and many others.

I say thank you, because I know you are essential every single day. Helping is in you nature. You will never have the cool uniform or bask in the media’s glory. You will continue, you will work, you will serve. Please know it does not go unnoticed, at least not by some. Thank you.

I just wanted to make sure we all recognized what we and those around us do every day. My apologies, if I left out a job. I know many more are out doing what they do thru all of this, ranchers, farmers, truckers, postal workers, butchers, bakers, medical, utility, emergency services, corrections, military, fire, teachers and so many, many more. Let me know of a career I possibly missed. Want to make sure we recognize every one and what they are doing to keep our communities and country moving. Give a shout out to those you know and love below or on my facebook author page @tammymayhew,author.

The Name Tag Debate

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“Hello my name is (fill in the blank as etched on my name tag), how may I help you?” There had been a great debate among many of my team members and colleagues over my long career in hospitality. As per a recent conversation with some of my service warrior friends still in the trenches, this debate rages on. I had the privilege of working with incredible people under some equally amazing franchise flags, and it was always mandated that we wear a name tag with our full name or first initial and last name or vice versa. As a GM mine also had to list my title, which I also hated.

I had good reason and rarely, unless we were being inspected, wore my name tag. It was a painfully obvious testament to human nature that the difficult or grossly unreasonable customer would treat me better than they treated my team members. As soon as they saw my name tag their tirade and tantrum would turn to sugar plums and bonbons. Not fair. I wanted to be treated just like my team and let the chips fall where they may.

With good cause I went so far as to petition my franchise for a waiver to this rule, only to have that request denied unilaterally without consideration. One of my supervisors had garnered the attention of a very serious stalker, one who followed her children to school and would let her know that they looked pretty and what they had been wearing. He ordered twenty pizzas to her department and had them delivered in her name to be paid. He broke into her department store room. She did everything right, she went to the police, got court orders to keep him away, and everything that could be put in place was. We all know a piece of paper, no matter who signs is doesn’t always stop them and it didn’t stop him. Her orders extended to work and we took it very seriously. My entire team was unnerved and scared.

Because of this incident I petitioned to take one of the following steps in the way of a waiver to the rule:

1. No name tags at all

2. Name tags with false names (list of which kept in office so we would be able to identify a team member if need be due to a customer comment.

3. Only use initials

4. Only use first names

The answer was a resounding NO. Undeterred, I called the head of the waiver request team and implored for reconsideration given the circumstances. The woman I spoke with, who will remain forever anonymous, said that while she could not give me formal waiver approval, the inspectors rarely or never verified the name on the tag itself. The call ended with an audibly sympathetic wink and a nod. I appreciated her back door advice but was upset that this was the only option both she and I had in easing the justifiable fear of my team.

What do you think full, false or no name tag? Should waivers be granted case by case, with good cause or a blanket change to just first name? What has been your experience and did you find other solutions you could share to help other fellow compromised service warriors?

“Cuss” “to” “me” “rrrrr” Service!#$@*

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I do not, and never will, think it is a coincidence that the phrase customer service starts phonetically with the word “cuss”. How many times have, any one of us, been cussed at when an unruly or entitled “cuss”tomer or guest was trying to force us into giving them whatever they wanted, regardless of whether or not it was deserved? If you have been a #customerservicewarrior for any length of time, I would say plenty of times. At least it was for me.

I can honestly say I was never actually cussed at when a customer had 1) a legitimate complaint, and 2) handled it in an appropriate manner. You know why? Because when they did, as all great #customerservicewarriors, Tammy Mayhew handled the situation and fixed the problem to satisfy the guest or customer. The key here and I will repeat; the customer had a valid complaint and dealt with it constructively. All of us did the very best that we could and provided the very best goods and services that we could. When that didn’t happen, we fixed it.

Then there were the one percent of “cuss”tomers who for some misguided reason believed that throwing around a number of foul words with ever increasing ferocity and pitch would somehow turn me into their cowering, delusional and spineless fairy godmother. They waved their fists like a magic wand, replacing abracadabra with a fevered misplaced, “Fuck you bitch!” We all know calling someone a bitch, cunt, fucker, dumbass or idiot with a prefix of mother, stupid, incompetent or fucking never put anyone in the mood to bend the rules for anyone.

You would think that when this happened, we would all get to level the playing field and release the little bitch that had, with the foul mouthed rant, been awakened in our minds. The one running rampant in our head trying to find a way past the forced smile and trembling hands. Sadly this wasn’t the case, not if we wanted to keep our jobs. Instead we would half heartedly nod, endlessly explain, fane an apology, and clench or teeth behind our smile in an attempt to contain and control our ever whirling justified bitchy little alter ego.

I never allowed it to happen to my team, without consequence to the customer. I always defended them. Myself not so much. I was nearly born into customer service and with that I developed a very thick skin. Scraps stitched together from foul language, names no child should be called, words an empathetic heart should never hear. I lost myself behind the sales counter. Shielded from their words by a cold hard piece of marble. Lost but fine. Always fine. (Insert smile here) Until I wasn’t anymore.

Do not lose yourself, do not listen to their rantings, do not accept their abuse, do not doubt your ability. Do smile and feel it inward, do your job well, live your life better, know your worth, defend your teams, unscript your life. And most off all keep a card handy with the contact information of at least two of your competitors and when you get the foul mouthed, unreasonable, narcissistic “cuss”tomer happily send them to darken the doorstep of your competition. Everyone will be happier, them, you and your team. Your competition maybe not so much.

I would very often tell them, in my very best sugar-coated customer service voice, “Thank you for the compliment and for the vocabulary lesson.” This never worked to well in diffusing the situation but it would make me feel better. This was right up there with letting a bitchy older (but not obviously older) customer know I gave them the senior discount, without them asking for it. Tell me what skillful little ways you have responded to a foul-mouthed, unjustified bitchy guest, when simple kindness and information did not work?

Seeking your Best Life or Hiding in Plain Sight

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One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Ready or not, here I come. Everyone has played hide and seek. Laughing, cautiously looking under, around and in, seeking our playmate or friends. It was always better to be the hider than the seeker, scoping out the never-before-used gem that would conceal us beyond discovery.  A victory if you were the last one found or better yet if they had to call you out. It was your best life.

As children we spent more hours hiding than seeking. For some of us we have spent a lifetime. We have become experts at hiding in plain sight. Skillfully keeping unnoticed barriers between ourselves and the world and people around us. Cloaks so expertly thrown that they are disregarded and overlooked by those passing by. We still find comfort and satisfaction in the mistaken anonymity of it all.

This is not to say we are skulking in a corner or brooding in a cubicle. Quite the contrary. We are out there, we are waiting on you with a gregarious laugh, expertly hidden by a waitress pad, pen and name tag. We are checking you in, with a perfectly rehearsed greeting and a friendly efficient smile, safely tucked behind the counter and fortified by our blazer. We are answering your call through the blind end of a telephone or chatting with you through the rhythm of a keystroke.  

It is easier to be outgoing when we put a well written script upon our tongue, refining it through repetition, like a well sharpened knife against an oiled stone. The sharpness of our delivery cutting through the awkward silence, drawing a smile and affirmation of self. We find comfort as we practice and perfect our speeches. We find succor in our skill and proficiency of making other people happy. We begin to define ourselves by what we do, rather than who we are, because often we don’t know what that means. We can’t become so good at hiding that we forget to seek.

Playing the game, we always searched for someone else, diligently leaving no stone unturned. When is the last time any of us put that much energy and effort into seeking ourselves? We often go into work and put on our persona along with our nametag and uniform, giving the best of ourselves to strangers. No one wants to step out of their well-fortified hiding place.  The soothing satisfying swaddle of well-practiced comfort is difficult to step away from.

Growing up, I was “voluntold” into a script for a much older character. The adolescent fun-filled game of hide and seek was gone by age ten, and I spent my days at my parents’ mom-and-pop hotel and diner, interacting more with adults than with children. At fifteen, with a life-altering accident under my belt, I found comfort on the stage of customer service, and replaced the relationships I had lost with professional ones. It was a safe place to be, one where I was accepted and found my worth in how well I pleased everyone around me. I was confident there. I endured. It took me years of baby steps, often overwhelming fear and anxiety, lots of tears, and the never-ending reassurance of my friends and family to fully step out of my hiding place.  

I am not saying go out and quit your job; after all, there all bills to pay and everyone needs to eat. Great if you can afford to do that, but if not, that’s okay too. We need to take a step from behind our safe place and see what we can bring to who we are. We need to ask ourselves what we have done to find us? What have we done that gives us that feeling of fear and excitement all at the same time?

Can we find one thing? Two things? Can we take one step? Can we do something we always wanted to do or something we never even considered? Even if we don’t like it, even if we fail, we tried it, and every experience adds a color to who we are. Like the broken beauty of a kaleidoscope. Life lies in the seeking, not the hiding. The more we seek, the better we will be, for ourselves and those around us. And who knows where those adventures will lead?

Say it and live it: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! Ready or Not, Here I come!

What are you doing to step out from hiding in plain sight? What are you doing to seek your best life? I’d love to read it below or share it to my facebook page @tammymayhew,author.